November 25, 2008

Zoltrog Dates Your Females

Zoltrog ventured into the dating abyss last weekend. The female was called "Deborah," and her smell was reminiscent of Floogtock. Yes, I know, most unpleasant!

Zoltrog and Deborah traveled to a mastication venue called "Olive Garden." It was most satisfactory. The serving staff challenged that their Earthly "breadsticks" and "salad" were never-ending. Mwahahaha! Do these humans not understand what it means to be Kroglovian??? When we conquer we inherit not only your women, your belongings, but we take also your appetite. As of two solar cycles ago Zoltrog has the appetite to consume an entire star system! What does your management think of that, Garden of Olives?! What does your management think of that?!

Deborah really opened up after we consumed some fermented fruit drink. She has apparently never been with an alien before. I told her, "Once you go Zoltrog, you never maintain the capacity to search otherwise for suitable seed providers."

Zoltrog believes he impressed Deborah with his sweet 1988 Mercury Topaz. It has traveled but 75,000 miles, and contains a compact disc player installed by Zoltrog's neighbor Tad.

Make your choice, Deborah! Mate with me while your Earth is still unconquered or become my seed-bearer under Kroglovian law when your planet is turned to ash! Mwahahaha!

End communication.

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