December 6, 2008

Zoltrog Yearns

Zoltrog is engaged in a creative writing class at the local community college. The week's assignment requires Zoltrog to become "in touch" with Zoltrog's feelings. Zoltrog is unfamiliar with this concept. Our touching is to be revealed through a po-em. Zoltrog has seen only glimpses of Earthling po-ems and Earthling feelings, but Zoltrog will attempt to create a sufficient facsimile and touch himself... What? Why do you laugh at Zoltrog?!

Malnourished Valved Life-Blood Supplier
by Zoltrog of the Kroglovian Empire

Manifestations of rulers past
Zoltrog is empty
Crushed bones and entrails hanging
From my third ear
But Racktok will not come.

Souls spill forth upon the fifth step of Toshkoff
Ti the oggled ostracized egg sack
Makes no amends with a princess
Enter maidens of four moons and twenty teats
For Racktok watches.

Ra, Tway, Ish, and Mechalay
Be gone on your interstellar breeding
Zoltrog denies not the gamey taste of severed limbs
My strength exits the quelf* dimension
Racktok is on his way.

Undercarriage of the Nebulor system, go forth!
Debate the grand hierarchy of your birthing companion
Make not the tears of Woofar your sustenance
But prepare your second egg for harvesting
For Racktok is here.

Apologies, Zoltrog needs a standard Earth minute... What?! No, Zoltrog is not crying! Zoltrog merely has something in his eye!

End communication.

*A dimension impossible for humans to even comprehend. Attempting to comprehend the quelf dimension will result in the explosion of your head.

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