March 18, 2013

Zoltrog Once Again Attends CPAC And Once Again Dominates CPAC!

Zoltrog was once again invited to attend the annual Conservative Political Action Conference.  Zoltrog must have really showed them what it means to be inhuman and strike terror into the Earth heart of mankind last year, because they were very enthusiastic about having Zoltrog back.

Zoltrog again rocked the housing containment structure.  They told Zoltrog to "bring the house down."  So Zoltrog complied -- A RARE MOMENT WHERE ZOLTROG WILL EVER COMPLY WITH HUMAN DEMANDS, UNLESS OF COURSE IT BRINGS ABOUT THEIR OWN DEMISE.  Zoltrog brought down a mere portion of the complex, killing only a klopthark of humans, but sending a terrifying message to the rest! Mwahahaha!

That message was clear!  You humans will not speak unless Zoltrog hollows out your carcass, wears your skin as a fine human suit, and speaks as if Zoltrog was you, which Zoltrog never would be.  Zoltrog is Zoltrog!  Mwahahaha!

Zoltrog points downward, the direction of where the
structure, or Earth house, would be brought.

Zoltrog went on with Zoltrog's speech, providing the bloodthirsty humans with the usual plan to destroy them and enslave their children so that Zoltrog could create a comfortable sleigh of doom pulled by the children of Earth.  Zoltrog proposed a 0% human survival rate and 0% tax rate of the future which gained massive applause from all humans present.  Zoltrog announced that under Zoltrog's reign, puny humans will be free to die by the hands of Zoltrog's mighty army any way they wish.  Again, the applause was deafening.

It is then no surprise that Zoltrog claims victory in the very scientifically accurate and legally binding straw poll of the Universe! See the results for yourself, Puny Human.  Look on them and then cry for your future doom!

This is just one of many Earth polls of Earth straw which will come crashing onto the landscape in your very bleak future!

Puny Human who is doomed says...

Oh, is that so, Puny Human who Zoltrog will deal with later? ...


Not only does Zoltrog defeat the puny human opposition handily, capturing a humanly impossible 100% of the Earth straw poll vote, but Zoltrog's portion of the Earth graph is superior in both length and girth!  Mwahahahaha!

You are puny in so many ways Earthlings! Mwahahaha!

End communication.

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